Here are the Five Most Annoying Sounds in the World:
Scientists at Australia's University of Newcastle had people listen to sounds while getting an M.R.I., and saw which sounds produced the strongest reaction in people's brains. Here are the five MOST annoying sounds in the world:
#1.) Rubbing a knife against a glass bottle.
#2.) Dragging a fork across glass.
#3.) Writing on a chalkboard with chalk.
#4.) Rubbing a ruler against a glass bottle.
#5.) Nails on a chalkboard.
People Think Barack Obama Would Beat Mitt Romney in a Fight . . . and They'd Rather Fold His Laundry:
58% of Americans think that BARACK OBAMA would beat MITT ROMNEY in a fistfight. 22% think Mitt would win. 20% had no opinion.
74% would rather be NEIGHBORS with the president . . . 26% picked Mitt . . . and 74.4% would rather have the president as their LANDLORD compared to 25.6% for Mitt.
If they were all neighbors, and the president and Mitt each left their laundry in a dryer in the laundry room, 72.4% of people would rather remove and fold the president's laundry. 27.6% would rather fold Mitt's.
And the biggest complaints people would have if the Obamas were their neighbors would be Bo's barking and MICHELLE hogging the fitness room. The biggest problem with the Romneys would be all the kids hanging out at the pool.
Mullet Discrimination? A Man Says He Was Kicked Out of a Bar Over His Long, Luxurious Mullet:
David Hoogland of Morley, Australia says he was kicked out of a bar last weekend . . . because of his MULLET.
David was hanging out with his fiancée and some friends at a bar called Print Hall, when management had security escort him out. And David is CONVINCED it's because of the long, luxurious mullet he's been growing for TEN YEARS.
Quote, "I'm not in a gang, I don't have tattoos all over me, I'm just an everyday person." He was wearing jeans, a t-shirt, and nice shoes at the time. But the bouncers told him they didn't want his "type" there.
When reporters called Print Hall, they wouldn't confirm or deny kicking David out over his mullet.
A Man Nearly Burns Down an Apartment Complex in His Attempt To Eat a Squirrel:
On Wednesday afternoon, in Holland Township, Michigan, a man was engaging in the fine redneck art of EATING ROADKILL.
Specifically, the man was using a PROPANE TORCH to try to burn the fur off a SQUIRREL before he cooked it and ate it.
And as that sometimes goes, he ended up accidentally setting his apartment on fire. The fire spread to the roof, which started CAVING IN while the other residents in the building fled. Twenty-nine of the 32 units in the building were occupied.
In a minor miracle, not a SINGLE person or pet was injured in the fire. Firefighters were able to put it out before the entire building burned down, but there was a TON of damage and all of the residents are now displaced.
So far, the man who started the fire hasn't been charged with a crime.
During a Police Raid, a Man is Caught Trying to Eat the Drugs He'd Hidden in His Rectum:
We hear about criminals hiding drugs in their rectums all the time. We NEVER hear about any of them who are willing to do something THIS disgusting.
Yesterday morning, police raided 26-year-old Anthony Leopold Rowe's home in Easton, Pennsylvania. Anthony was a known drug dealer who had a felony arrest warrant for selling heroin.
When the cops arrived, Anthony's first instinct was, of course, to jam as many drugs into his rectum as he could. For some reason he decided to shove his marijuana up there and leave his heroin out.
Then, as Anthony ran from the police, he did something you just don't usually see . . . he took the marijuana OUT of his no-go hole and started EATING IT.
The police caught him before he could swallow all of it. He was charged with several crimes for heroin and marijuana possession, and also for tampering with evidence.
One final note: This all went down as Anthony was wearing a t-shirt that looks like a fake cardigan and bowtie, with a nametag that says, quote, "Sexy and I know it." Nothing about his morning was sexy. Nothing.